Addiction and shame can go together, and cause each to make the other worse. While addiction is not usually the primary cause of shame, most addiction cases involve shame. Thankfully, it is possible to learn and utilize healthy coping mechanisms to make sure shame doesn’t sabotage progress toward sobriety and building a better life. Shame can even be turned into motivation to overcome the obstacles of addiction.
What is Shame?
It is important to understand that shame and guilt are two separate entities. Shame is an unhealthy state of self-loathing that strips a person of their confidence, determination, and self-respect. Guilt is a conscience-provoked feeling stemming from an understood bad behavior.
Shame is most often not provoked by outside circumstances, and stems from unfounded negative feelings of worthlessness similar. Correlatively, shame is among the primary contributors to relapse. Sadly, the majority of those experiencing shame are unaware of it. They may see their negative outlook as based in truth, when in reality shame can work in tandem with conditions like clinical depression to hinder a person’s ability to cope.
How Does Shame Relate to Addiction?
Here are just a few factors of how addiction and shame relate to one another. Not all forces may be at play when someone experiences shame, but they may inspire a cycle of certain actions increasing shame and hindering a person’s ability to make decisions with confidence.
Pre-existing mental health conditions can lead to substance abuse as a means to temporarily escape one’s state of self-loathing. Unfortunately, this temporary fix leads to the re-emergence of symptoms and an increased desire for addictive substances. This can eventually lead to deeper self-loathing and low self-esteem.
Individuals who go through emotional bouts of shame may be more susceptible to rash behaviors. This may result in self-destructive behaviors that can take a toll on them and those around them. This may include indulging in drugs or alcohol use, which can create an even deeper problem through potential drug or alcohol dependency (and induce further shame).
Since shame wears down confidence levels, it can lead most people to think less about their personal well-being. The discouraged party will often find themselves doing things they wouldn’t normally do. They may also not seek help for problems that emerge as a result of shame, including addiction.
In some cases, the state of one’s addiction in itself can be the cause of an individual’s shame. They may think there’s no hope of them overcoming their addiction. This can create a never-ending cycle of addiction and shame leading to potentially dangerous levels of self-harm.
Which Mental Health Conditions are Linked to Shame?
A variety of mental health conditions directly relate to shame, especially when left untreated. This can fuel destructive behaviors, including addiction.
Depression is characterized by low self-esteem, lack of self-worth, extreme sadness, hopelessness, and all the factors that can feed emotional shame. Treatment for depression disorders can frequently include working through prolonged feelings of shame.
Many anxiety disorders can cause unfounded anxiety that even the sufferer doesn’t understand, which may lead to shame for the anxiety they feel. If not recognized as anxiety, the feelings experienced by the person with anxiety may cause shame due to their irrational negative nature. Experiencing loss of control due to anxiety, such as experiencing panic attacks, may cause further shame.
Being diagnosed with bipolar disorder is nothing to be ashamed of, but individuals may feel shame or embarrassment for experiencing bipolar or manic episodes. If not managed, bipolar disorder can lead to impulsive behavior and problems with concentration. Actions undertaken under these conditions may lead the person with the disorder to experience shame.
Eating disorders such as anorexia and bulimia or very serious mental disorders give the strugglers a false image of their body and health. They may cause individuals to feel unfounded shame about their weight or level of fitness. Maintaining a sense of control becomes extremely important, and any deterrence from the plan and/or routine can cause feelings of distress.
How to Start Healing from Feelings of Shame
Feeling shame is a repetitive cycle that takes discipline to break. Thankfully, there are actions you can take to begin the healing process and create a new cycle of positive reinforcement. Here are a few tips and keys to fend off shame and create new positive habits.
The proverb “two heads are better than one” rings true when it comes to having strength in numbers to help you fend off shameful emotions. Having the right friends or family members to encourage you can provide the confidence to overcome shame.
This goes in line with the prior point, yet is an important tip in itself. Depression and shame often bring about the desire to be alone, when that’s the worst circumstance for anybody facing such discouragement. The more time depressed and shamed individuals spend alone, the greater the risk of getting lost in negative self-loathing thoughts. Even if you’re not spending time with family or friends, getting out into the community or spending time in group therapy can help lighten the feelings of shame.
In the midst of shame, consider the question, “What action or thought led to this feeling of shame?” Identifying these triggers for negative thoughts or feelings can guide you on how to avoid these triggers in the future. Self-discovery occurs by being observant of the behaviors that cause these feelings so you can alter your behavioral patterns.
Regularly exercising in any form, whether it be jogging, walking, or strength training naturally stimulates dopamine production. The natural production of dopamine, the “happy chemical,” can be helpful in combatting depression, discouragement, or any shame-related emotions. It may help to consult your doctor about an organized, non-overwhelming exercise plan to help you naturally overcome your negative bouts of discouragement.
Denial of shame can be bad and unproductive for anybody experiencing bouts of self-loathing, mainly because denial makes one believe the shame. Acknowledging your struggles with shame can help you move forward in realizing your shame may be an exaggeration or deception of your perspective. The truth of a condition is usually much less harsh than the pressure of shame may have a person believe.
All of the aforementioned keys are achieved better with the proper treatment and professional coaching techniques. A compassionate mental health counselor can help an individual implement techniques for combating shame. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is designed to help a person recognize the relationship between their thoughts, behaviors, and actions. By recognizing these relationships, an individual can be empowered to take control of the cycle and disrupt the influence of shame.
Can Shame Be An Obstacle to Recovery?
Shame’s diminishment of self-confidence and motivation can be a roadblock to any recovery path. This is just one of the many ways addiction and shame frequently cross paths. That’s why it is of the utmost importance to treat one’s sense of shame in conjunction with their addiction rehab goals. In almost every case, if the shame is overcome, the sky’s the limit to achieving all one’s sobriety goals.
Build a Life of Recovery at Principles Recovery
Addiction and shame can both be overcome with professional help and a support system. At Principles Recovery Center, we can help you build a healthier life of sobriety. With different therapy modalities and levels of treatment, it’s possible to achieve freedom from addiction. Treatment is also available for co-occurring mental health disorders, with dual diagnosis treatment available to take mental disorders into account when developing coping mechanisms for addiction.
You don’t have to live a life of addiction. Contact us today to learn more.
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